"Welcome to the top five meaningless lists that absolutely,
positively needed to find a place on jeffthomas.com!"
The FIVE
Funniest "Police Academy" Movies:
1.] "Police
Academy" 2.] Any episode of "Adam-12" 3.] "NYPD Blue" episodes that show Sipowicz's butt 4.] Damaged BetaCam footage of my grandfather nodding off while listening
his police scanner 5.] "Police Academy" 2-7
FOUR Ways
That I Rationalize Why Having Digital Cable Television Is Better Than Having A Girlfriend:
1.] I know how to turn on
digital cable. 2.] It can stay turned on all night. 3.] It doesn't mind if I fall asleep while it's turned on. 4.] The mute button.
THREE Tom
Clancy Movies That You'll Only Find In Video Stores That Also Specialize In Leather
Accessories:
1.] "Patriot Gays"
2.] "Queer And Present Danger" 3.] "The Hunt For Fred October"
The TWO
Most Likely Reasons Why You Ended Up At jeffthomas.com
1.] You know me. 2.] My mom made you come here.
The ONE
Reason Why Life Could Be Worse Than Visiting jeffthomas.com:
1.] Right now, you're
missing "Police Academy" 2-7 on digital cable!